Nausea, fatigue and moodiness are our roommates. We live with contradictory partners: hope and poison. Where does stamina come from? What about grace? Pure will. Steel thread, Steel cable. Girder. Thin strand again.
Our survivor friend finds her power as researcher. My partner ignores all scientific reports, medical journals and pilots her small ship by attending to what is in front of her each hour. Each day. Each minute of each hour of each day.
I am the chart reader, forecast receiver. I catalogue everything but do not share unless asked. Forever processing—a feeble microchip. Calculating, relaying, paraphrasing, converting to plain speech the most convoluted and contradicting.
No, I am the ballast. Below decks. Storm-tossed and coming back to center again and again.